Your Overthinking Isn't the Enemy (And What It's Really Trying to Do)

Your Trauma Therapist by Lauren Auer, LCPC is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. For more content follow me on Instagram.

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I remember watching her hands move faster than her words as she sat across from me in my therapy office, mapping out every possible scenario that could go wrong in her life. Her voice grew more urgent with each potential disaster she described, each theoretical outcome she needed to prepare for. I waited for a natural pause, then gently asked:

"What would happen if you didn't figure it all out right now?"

She froze. I noticed her throat tighten, tears springing to her eyes, catching us both off guard. In that moment, we both recognized her constant mental spinning for what it truly was – not an annoying habit or personal failure, but a protector that had been working overtime to keep her safe.

I've witnessed this moment hundreds of times in my therapy office, this recognition that transforms shame into understanding. Maybe you know this place too. The endless loop of thoughts that plays like a broken record, especially when you're trying to rest. The way "just stop thinking about it" feels about as helpful as someone telling you to "just stop bleeding" when you've cut yourself.

Here's what I've learned, both as a therapist and as someone who's walked this path: There's a reason your brain developed this habit of constant analysis, and it's not because something is wrong with you. It's because something happened to you, and your nervous system found an ingenious way to keep you safe.

Think of it like this: when we experience something our body can't handle – whether it's a single overwhelming event or years of subtle but constant stress – our system needs somewhere to go. It's like being in a house during a flood. When the water rises on the first floor, we naturally move upstairs to stay dry.