I’ve had many therapists in my life. The one that helped with my PTSD-recovery was probably the most pivotal - she had an intense emotional reaction to the letter I wrote to my doctor/abuser. It showed me that she was human and attuned to my pain, and that I was also human and justified in my pain. 💚
That intense emotional reaction from your therapist validated something deep - that what happened to you mattered enough to move another person. I'm glad you found someone who could be that present with you in your healing.
I love this so much, friend. I've been a therapist for over 20 years and I used to think (and panic!) that I had to solve my clients' problems. That caused me to be in my own head during most of the session, freaking out about saying the "right" thing.
Fast forward many years into the future, I now lead more with my heart as a therapist. I try to sit and listen to what they need, holding space rather than trying to "fix" anything. It helps me be more present and engaged with my clients. Plus, I can share bits of my experience (divorce, dad's death, past issues with drinking, eating disorder) and how I moved through those situations with my clients as appropriate.
It's more about what works instead of what's "right."
Yes! That shift from trying to solve to simply being present changes everything. Twenty years in and you're describing exactly what I wish I'd learned earlier. There's such freedom in leading with heart instead of frantically searching for the 'right' intervention. Thank you for adding your wisdom here.
"My accidental humanity had communicated something my careful reflections hadn't: I was really listening. I was really there. And I was on their side."
As a therapist (now retired) who specialized in treating C-PTSD, and as a client in recovery from C-PTSD myself, I very much appreciate your perspective. Thank you for the time and thoughtfulness you devoted to writing this post.
Coming from someone who has walked both sides of the therapeutic relationship, especially with complex trauma, your words mean a lot. There's something so powerful about understanding healing from both the personal and professional lens. I'm grateful you took the time to share your perspective here.
Really enjoyed this article. I wanted to go to grad school and never got the opportunity. I found some solace in being a peer counselor for awhile. It was refreshing to read about psychology education on Substack! I really miss my college days where I majored in psychology as a part-time student and full-time employee!
Some of the most healing connections happen in those spaces where shared experience meets genuine care. Thank you for the years you spent supporting others in that role. It sounds like your psychology background served you (and the people you helped) well, even if the traditional grad school path didn't unfold as planned.
As someone who’s starting up my graduate studies next year this is so interesting and beautiful to read, and something I will keep with me through my studies.
As someone who has been in therapy for over a decade now, I am so grateful for those therapists who empathized and expressed outwardly that they heard me and empathized.
It was seeing the humanity in my therapist that allowed myself to be ok with how human I am.
This is very heartwarming and true!
Thank you, Lisha! Sometimes the simplest truths are the most heartwarming ones.
I’ve had many therapists in my life. The one that helped with my PTSD-recovery was probably the most pivotal - she had an intense emotional reaction to the letter I wrote to my doctor/abuser. It showed me that she was human and attuned to my pain, and that I was also human and justified in my pain. 💚
That intense emotional reaction from your therapist validated something deep - that what happened to you mattered enough to move another person. I'm glad you found someone who could be that present with you in your healing.
I love this so much, friend. I've been a therapist for over 20 years and I used to think (and panic!) that I had to solve my clients' problems. That caused me to be in my own head during most of the session, freaking out about saying the "right" thing.
Fast forward many years into the future, I now lead more with my heart as a therapist. I try to sit and listen to what they need, holding space rather than trying to "fix" anything. It helps me be more present and engaged with my clients. Plus, I can share bits of my experience (divorce, dad's death, past issues with drinking, eating disorder) and how I moved through those situations with my clients as appropriate.
It's more about what works instead of what's "right."
Yes! That shift from trying to solve to simply being present changes everything. Twenty years in and you're describing exactly what I wish I'd learned earlier. There's such freedom in leading with heart instead of frantically searching for the 'right' intervention. Thank you for adding your wisdom here.
Thank you for reading it! It's so refreshing to share these thoughts with other like-minded people, so this is a breath of fresh air!
"My accidental humanity had communicated something my careful reflections hadn't: I was really listening. I was really there. And I was on their side."
As a therapist (now retired) who specialized in treating C-PTSD, and as a client in recovery from C-PTSD myself, I very much appreciate your perspective. Thank you for the time and thoughtfulness you devoted to writing this post.
Coming from someone who has walked both sides of the therapeutic relationship, especially with complex trauma, your words mean a lot. There's something so powerful about understanding healing from both the personal and professional lens. I'm grateful you took the time to share your perspective here.
Really enjoyed this article. I wanted to go to grad school and never got the opportunity. I found some solace in being a peer counselor for awhile. It was refreshing to read about psychology education on Substack! I really miss my college days where I majored in psychology as a part-time student and full-time employee!
Some of the most healing connections happen in those spaces where shared experience meets genuine care. Thank you for the years you spent supporting others in that role. It sounds like your psychology background served you (and the people you helped) well, even if the traditional grad school path didn't unfold as planned.
This is so real. I think I’ve done some of my best work when I’ve done the opposite of what I’m “supposed” to do.
Thank you. So.much. I wish I could share my grad school thesis for forensic psychology. Wow! Just wow!
As someone who’s starting up my graduate studies next year this is so interesting and beautiful to read, and something I will keep with me through my studies.
As someone who has been in therapy for over a decade now, I am so grateful for those therapists who empathized and expressed outwardly that they heard me and empathized.
It was seeing the humanity in my therapist that allowed myself to be ok with how human I am.
Brilliant ✨ I think the “break the rules like an artist” notion applies here… and yes, you’re the best… at this and just in general. 💗