With my lived and professional experience of trauma healing this article is spot on. Thank you.
One important healing strategy for me is embracing slow living and creating space for my emotions, grief recovery and trauma healing. I mostly use nature, writing and meditation for this.
I also reframe insomnia as my mind needing to process stuff. So I make myself a hot drink and embrace the stillness of the night which facilitates connection to my emotions so I can better release and ease them. I’m lucky I’ve got flexible work so I can catch up on lost sleep with a short afternoon Power Nap.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, Piata. I love how you've reframed insomnia as "my mind needing to process stuff" - what a beautiful shift from fighting against those sleepless hours to honoring them as healing time. Your comment reminds me that healing isn't just about the big therapeutic breakthroughs but also about these small daily rituals where we give ourselves permission to simply be with what is.
There truly is no hiding from ourselves, no matter how creative our avoidance tactics. And perhaps there's a strange comfort in that truth - that eventually, our deepest selves will find ways to be heard.
This is an outstanding article. Really appreciate the impactful suggestions to create space for these traumatic memories, rather than try to tamp them down. It's true, that doesn't work, and that caused me a lot of frustration over the years when I listened to the "just let it go" types, who promised peace and happiness if you did just that.
Great!
How?
Because man did I try. But yes, like those roller skating elephants (I am actually able to shut those images out when challenged, part of my deliciously defiant nature I suppose lol, plus I wasn't traumatized by elephants thank God!), it's a fool's errand trying to make that stuff go away without addressing it.
In the end, our deeper, younger selves want to be okay. This speaks to the kind of shadow work and inner child work that allows us the framework to process grief, trauma, shame, rage and all the rest. Acknowledging that this stuff is real, and valid, and yes distressing and frustrating as well, is a key starting point.
David, your comment made me smile with recognition. That frustration when well-meaning people say "just let it go" without the how - I've been there too, both personally and with clients. Your line about "our deeper, younger selves want to be okay" feels so profoundly true. I think that's what's happening when those memories keep surfacing; those younger parts of us are simply asking to be acknowledged, to have their experiences validated rather than dismissed.
I love your mention of shadow work and inner child work as frameworks. They provide those safe containers I talked about, where we can finally turn toward what's been chasing us. And your deliciously defiant nature that resists purple elephants? That made me laugh - and also reminds me that we all bring our unique strengths to this healing journey. Thank you for such a thoughtful response.
It really is the ultimate paradox, isn't it? The very thing that feels like it should work becomes the thing that amplifies our struggle. I'm constantly amazed by how much of healing involves these counterintuitive moves - leaning toward the discomfort rather than away. Thanks for affirming this from your professional perspective!
Love reading your posts, Lauren! They are so enlightening. Thank you for taking the time to write, create this content and push it out to the world. ❤️
Creating content that connects with others makes those late nights writing totally worth it. Thank you for being part of this community and for taking the time to leave such a supportive comment.
With my lived and professional experience of trauma healing this article is spot on. Thank you.
One important healing strategy for me is embracing slow living and creating space for my emotions, grief recovery and trauma healing. I mostly use nature, writing and meditation for this.
I also reframe insomnia as my mind needing to process stuff. So I make myself a hot drink and embrace the stillness of the night which facilitates connection to my emotions so I can better release and ease them. I’m lucky I’ve got flexible work so I can catch up on lost sleep with a short afternoon Power Nap.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, Piata. I love how you've reframed insomnia as "my mind needing to process stuff" - what a beautiful shift from fighting against those sleepless hours to honoring them as healing time. Your comment reminds me that healing isn't just about the big therapeutic breakthroughs but also about these small daily rituals where we give ourselves permission to simply be with what is.
Great writing — thank you for opening up a space for this conversation.
The harder we fight a memory, the deeper it digs in — like trying to shove water uphill with our hands.
Naming it, letting it exist without trying to fix it right away, feels like one of the few ways to stop being eaten alive by it.
Glad I stopped to read this today.
There's no hiding from ourselves...
There truly is no hiding from ourselves, no matter how creative our avoidance tactics. And perhaps there's a strange comfort in that truth - that eventually, our deepest selves will find ways to be heard.
This is an outstanding article. Really appreciate the impactful suggestions to create space for these traumatic memories, rather than try to tamp them down. It's true, that doesn't work, and that caused me a lot of frustration over the years when I listened to the "just let it go" types, who promised peace and happiness if you did just that.
Great!
How?
Because man did I try. But yes, like those roller skating elephants (I am actually able to shut those images out when challenged, part of my deliciously defiant nature I suppose lol, plus I wasn't traumatized by elephants thank God!), it's a fool's errand trying to make that stuff go away without addressing it.
In the end, our deeper, younger selves want to be okay. This speaks to the kind of shadow work and inner child work that allows us the framework to process grief, trauma, shame, rage and all the rest. Acknowledging that this stuff is real, and valid, and yes distressing and frustrating as well, is a key starting point.
Thank you so much Lauren.
David, your comment made me smile with recognition. That frustration when well-meaning people say "just let it go" without the how - I've been there too, both personally and with clients. Your line about "our deeper, younger selves want to be okay" feels so profoundly true. I think that's what's happening when those memories keep surfacing; those younger parts of us are simply asking to be acknowledged, to have their experiences validated rather than dismissed.
I love your mention of shadow work and inner child work as frameworks. They provide those safe containers I talked about, where we can finally turn toward what's been chasing us. And your deliciously defiant nature that resists purple elephants? That made me laugh - and also reminds me that we all bring our unique strengths to this healing journey. Thank you for such a thoughtful response.
Thanks, Lauren. We definitely see things in a similar way. 😊
Yes! Love this. It feels so counterintuitive, but pushing the thing away only makes it worse.
It really is the ultimate paradox, isn't it? The very thing that feels like it should work becomes the thing that amplifies our struggle. I'm constantly amazed by how much of healing involves these counterintuitive moves - leaning toward the discomfort rather than away. Thanks for affirming this from your professional perspective!
Love reading your posts, Lauren! They are so enlightening. Thank you for taking the time to write, create this content and push it out to the world. ❤️
Creating content that connects with others makes those late nights writing totally worth it. Thank you for being part of this community and for taking the time to leave such a supportive comment.